THE RULER!!!!

Yo, me and my boy Roy C be kickin around…the first time we seen each other in like, well Roy?, 7 months is it? And somehow Slick Rick comes up in the conversation…
… Yeah, out of all the shit we’ve talked about, Slick Rick warrants a post. What the fuck, Gabe?
Nursery Rhymes, BITCH!!!!
Okay, You got me. Word. Peace!
Is that how we gonna leave the RULER?!?!?
Yes.

Conditioning through Advertising


I was in the kitchen making dinner, while half-watching an episode of CSI I’d already seen. During an advertisement, I heard this line, “No matter how you see an Army soldier, you have to look up to them.” Funny how the line that sets off my fascism alarm is the one my ears actually paid attention to. So, not much to say here, except for the fact that the ad is written to condition you fucking sheep to venerate soldiers and the forces that go to war above all other people in our society. Above all other humans for that matter.
God, I really do wish that we didn’t live in a society bent on destroying humanity and the world and forcing society into a highly paranoid and aggressive pack of brainless sheep.
Think on it, please.

Marion Jones goes down harder than Clemens will…

So, it is somewhat early on a day off for me, which leads to one effect on this here post…over-simplification. In the drug culture of sports, I see some [more] examples of race and gender inequalities our society clutches to like a 5 year old with a blanket that mommy is trying to take away, because the kid should just grow the fuck up, but the kid’s grip is welded shut.
In this age of “pulling back the curtain” on performance-enhancing drug use, the force with which athletes will fall from grace is directly correlated to their race and gender(gods forbid that we would have to include sexuality here, because nobody is stupid enough to come out in that frat-fuck culture until after they retire and can get away to safe ground). So, Marion Jones has received sentence already today(sure she was involved in some check fraud scam, but she is being skewered primarily for admitting steroid use). That didn’t take the “fair & equitable” American justice system long to dispense of a Black woman, who, by the way…CAME CLEAN about her steroid use and showed genuine remorse…didn’t we already cover that fucking ground?!? But, hey, she’s a woman, first of all, which means that we, as a society, feel she should have been smart and responsible enough not to even touch PEDs(Performance Enhancing Drugs) in the first place. And, let’s not forget, she’s Black, so the Amerikkkan justice system must deal with her swiftly and harshly. I’m not saying that she should receive full clemency for her wrong-doing(and I only barely care about the check fraud thing…let’s not kid ourselves, pro and olympic athletes have been doping like rabid badgers for decades now. if you can read, then read Ball Four). However, she is certainly not receiving the treatment that Lance Armstrong, Roger Clemens or Barry Bonds have and will receive.
Oh, so let’s approach Barry Bonds for a moment, and a quick one at that cuz I’m tired of this asshole. A man(child really, but whatever, his driver’s license might indicate the age of a man), so obsessed with being the best and owning the most coveted records in all of baseball, who has obviously taken PEDs. I mean, really, the last time a portion of society was this concerned with head size was the Social Darwinists. Anyways, he will most certainly go down. There has already been significant talk of him never playing again after his indictment, which looks pretty certain to divvy out some jail time to him, as well. And the scrutiny he has endured these past few years dwarfs, beyond a shadow of a doubt, anything that that weaselly cracker Roger Clemens will have to go through. Even though, they are probably equally guilty of using PEDs and lying about it, to whoever…doesn’t matter to me(ethically, if you lie to your kids about it, that’s the same as a Federal Jury on some human level). Nonetheless, Bonds is Black and should pay for his sins to an extent that no white man would even dream of.
I mean, Roger Clemens gets to go on 60 Minutes and chum it up with Mike Wallace…a way to clear his name with some of the moronic masses who watch horribly scripted “news” shows and take it at face value. And, as I am tiring of typing for now, I’ll only barely mention the fucking fluff piece done on Mark McGwire and how Lance Armstrong is just simply, an untouchable god of cycling(even though, Eddy Merckx woulda kicked his ass!).
So, even if I approached all this with the grace of a 2 year old eating applesauce, hopefully you, my non-existent readers, will begin to think a bit more about all this.
ps – am I getting the cynical and sardonic bit down at all??

8 Diagrams


Well, I’ve had my initial, quick-flip-through listen to the new Wu-Tang Clan album, 8 Diagrams. I have to say that, even though I don’t expect 36 Chambers type brilliance, it is still a disappointment in the early going. To focus on the positive for a moment, however, there is one track that I had to play over and over in the car. “Campfire”(coincidentally the first track) has a sick production that even conjured up some late night outdoor excursion(possibly a campfire, but not exclusively) before I even knew the track name. Maybe it has to do with the barbershop quartet-style vocal bassline intertwined with the little, yet effective string sweep. Great track and all three verses by Meth, Ghost & Cappadonna are stellar. It’s just a bit of a bummer, though, that is about the only highlight, for me, so far.
I think that this may be indicative of my high, yet possibly decaying, standards for Hip-Hop and what I wish to hear. This is a many-sided problem(like some self-indulgent, archaic, snobbish 20-sided die…roll me and see how many upturned-nose reasons I can give for not liking 95% of Hip-Hop after, oh, about 1996). It seems that this will be an oft-appearing thread of thought and criticism for me in this space.
As for now, it’s late and I gotta wake up early to work at a) one job that is harshin my mellow like sandpaper jockstraps and then b) the other job, which I like, but will put me home at 3 am.
Out.E.5000.G

the fine art of the Dine & Dash

OK, look…If you feel the need to execute a dine and dash, let me spell out a quick moral guide for you(as if you didn’t already know, but if you didn’t, you’re a douchebag!).
I would say that the first rule(and maybe ONLY rule) to dine and dashing has everything to do with the dining establishment in question itself. If you are sitting down to a meal at a restaurant that is family owned and not a chain operated business, then that would be your first tip as to a place not to carry out this kind of mission. Chain restaurants are a much better target; they have so much more money to cover such incidences than mom and pop type spots. Also, you probably would know some of the folks who work at a family owned jonx as opposed to a chain-operated spot, which should lend to an atmosphere of family/friend that should prohibit such actions.
The reason I am bringing this up is due to the fact that my boy John, who works at a family-run restaurant, recently had a run-in with some dumbfuck who thought he could go for the dine & dash gold at his place of employment. According to John, the guy ran up a tab in excess of $85 and then proceeded to hit up the front door like a subway turnstile and kept struttin on…Well, John didn’t take to this lightly, as he shouldn’t(being that it is his livelyhood!!), and chased the guy out the door and, in the ensuing mess, tackled the guy, only to have hime get away as John was attempting to call the cops. The squirrelly fuck threw him to the ground and then bounced like the check he left.
I used to work at the same spot and I didn’t dig it, for many reasons, but I wouldn’t advocate a dine and dash there, primarily due to the fact that it is a family-run spot and my boy John works there(most importantly!). I have performed a dine and dash before, but it was a Dennys’ and it was 4 in the morning, when my friend and I had waited an hour and a half for food and even longer for a check that never appeared…so we, drunkenly, took advantage of the opportunity at hand in a corporate spot that has no ties to the community and pays their workers the same shit wages no matter what(by the way, we left a tip for the poor waitress, who was so completely overworked and bogged down).
I guess, maybe with no real valid reasons to back me up, I just feel that if you are going to dine & dash, just try not to pick a spot that is family run and has folks workin their asses off just to get to the next paycheck(which is true of Dennys’ workers, too, but I still feel differently justified…!!)
Goodnight for now and hopefully, I will be able to castigate the world more clearly tomorrow.
Love, Rev. Gabelicious

welcome!

Happy New Year everybody(probably nobody at this point, seeing as nobody will be reading this for a while)!
Just a quick note to reflect the passing of a calendar year, something completely arbitrarily created by humans, but seemingly necessary at this point in our “evolution” or “progress”.
Anyways. I will be using this space to spill forth a plethora of thoughts, ideas, frustrations, celebrations of the Boston Red Sox, and criticisms of the glorious, illustrious culture and society we inhabit, endure and influence.
Initially, it will seem(to me) that I will be babbling uncontrollably to myself, or perhaps another personality or 5, but eventually, I hope there can exist a conversation here…or “dialogue” as it was favorably, yet snobishly, referred to in my course of college studies. Ah yes, my first crack!! Do I really despise the institution of education? That question is for you to figure out, and many more, as we continue on.
So, for now, in the drunkenly immortal words of my good friend and myself on New Year’s Eve, “If you have hate in your heart, let it out!!! Hate hate hate in the 0-8!!”
Cheers and Go Red Sox!!!